Step 1 to Tough Talks: Be Honest

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Mom waits nervously in the car. Today is the day she has been planning for ages: the day she has a tough talk with her child about the big family secret. They have a date set up and Mom has planned this out meticulously. She wonders if she has waited too long and how her […]

DBT Skills: How to Change Your Emotions

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If you didn’t have the opportunity to read my last blog, I’d suggest checking it out before reading this one. As I mentioned in my discussion of emotional regulation, it is very common for people to come to counseling hoping to control their emotions. However, emotions are not always controllable. But with the skills of […]

Negotiation: American Pickers vs Fixer Upper

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We use negotiation for lots of obvious things–garage sales, jobs, buying large items like cars and homes. However, if you look closely, finding negotiations is easy: from divvying up chores, to where you will spend Christmas this year. This article describes negotiating while maintaining relationships. Positional Negotiation Two of my favorite shows illustrate different styles of […]

DBT Skills: Emotion Regulation

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I hear it all the time: “I need to get my emotions under control!” or “How do I stop feeling this way?” At times, it may seem like if you could just control your emotions, most of your problems would be fixed! You try all kinds of methods for doing this: emotional eating, distracting yourself, […]

DBT Skills: Mindfulness

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    How often do  you find yourself on your smart phone, scrolling through Facebook or playing Candy Crush, with no memory of having picked it up or why you felt the need to be on it? Or how often do you realize, in the middle of driving to work, that you have no memory of […]

A Play Therapist Reviews 4 Fidgets

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Fidgets are all the rage and I’ve caught the bug. So I did what any professional play therapist does and I bought all the toys and played with them. For research, of course! Procedure Ok, if I’m a social scientist [and therapists are], I have to tell you the procedure I used to ‘test’ these […]

Eating and Identity

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“You are what you eat.” I don’t know about you, but I’ve never considered myself to be a plate of chilaquiles and two scoops of ice cream. This old adage that the food you eat becomes you may seem far-fetched when stated so blatantly, but isn’t this what today’s culture asks us to believe about […]

Letting the Air Out of the Ball

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Usually clients come to counseling because of symptoms that they have never experienced before such as anxiety, panic attacks, unexplained anger, and feeling more depressed. They go on to say their lives are good and have coped well before but are now are confused at their unexpected inability to cope. As I hear their story, […]